Hello, friends. I’ve come to realize that no matter what, I will always be busy, but I miss writing. So I’m going to make time for it. I figure it’s time for a figurative cup of coffee, because there’s a lot to catch you up on.
If we were having a cup of coffee, I’d tell you about my new friend. Something you should know about grad school: classes are tiny. Our entire cohort is 30 people, but classes are split up even more than that. I didn’t expect to make friends there, given how statistically improbable it was. I’m an adult. I expected to graduate. Not to enjoy the process.
But then! I met a friend, and we became close. I met up with her several times after school and realized why this friendship felt different. With other friends, I am more guarded. And with this friend, I am free to be myself. Something else about friends: they make life feel lighter. Classes pass quicker. Essays are easier to write (because you know someone else can commiserate). Practicum isn’t as challenging when you can discuss your clients with someone who knows them as well as you.
If we were having a cup of coffee, I’d tell you that my boyfriend got into medical school! Actually, I wouldn’t tell you that unless I knew you, though I am bursting with pride about news that aren’t even mine. I’d be frank about it, though, and maybe hold the cup of coffee extra tightly when explaining that there was a chance of him going out of state. Except that wasn’t what happened. We will both be in CA!
If we were having a cup of coffee, I would tell you how interesting it is to do therapy with a teen. I always thought I grew up fast. I started college young and pressed “fast forward” on my education. But once a week, it feels like I step into a time machine that takes me back to age 11, when days started at 8 am and ended at 3:03, when girls did everything in pairs, when I described my style as “whatever is popular”. My teen takes me back there through her descriptions of who is dating whom and who is wearing what. It is a fascinating glimpse at what kids are like. It makes me wonder how much more different future generations will be.
If we were having a cup of coffee, I’d tell you that I’ve been making conscious efforts to slow my pace. I am an energetic person. After a day of class, I have energy to work and to go to the gym. I cook dinner and then I struggle to sleep at night. If you didn’t know me, you’d tell me it sounds like a manic episode, but trust me, it’s not like that. However, in dedicating every waking minute to clinical psychology, whether to studying assessments or doing therapy, I realized that I haven’t made time for my other interests. This past week, I went to synagogue. I took a nap.
I walked to the park today with my grandma. I bounded up to the top of a very high hill, and then when I was wonderfully out of breath, I sat on a fence post and looked down. The children playing soccer were miniature moving specks. The barking from the dogs below quieted. And I got to thinking about how I needed to make time for things like this more, for looking unhurriedly at this view and feeling this peace. I needed to make time to write again.
I’ve been saying “if we were having a cup of coffee”, but the irony is, I probably wouldn’t have time to get a cup of coffee with you. I think that is kind of sad. So here’s to slowing down a bit. Here’s to actually getting coffee and not just saying that we will.